CUTE ENOUGH TO KISS! Alex McShane was 46 and still knew how to rock n’ roll. So did his brothers Jay, 38 and Colin, 30. And growing up with the three brothers was Alex’s son, Trey, 25. Jay was very talented with the lead guitar, and Colin laid down the beats with his drums. Alex always segued the brothers with his bass fretwork and he was the longtime frontman of the “Mack Attack” band – until Trey came of age and he wowed everyone with his soaring vocals and natural stage presence.
But the gigs for a band reared on Foghat and Foreigner seemed to be less and less. At Jay’s suggestion, they decided to be a professional cover band. Jay’s hero on lead guitar was always Ace Frehley, and Trey always reminded his dad of a young Paul Stanley. All four McShanes knew the entire catalogue of songs by the self proclaimed “Hottest Band on Earth.”
So the decision was made – “KISS This!” was booked for its debut at the Argus Tavern that Saturday. Alex and Trey weren’t looking forward to the application of the makeup – especially the white paint that Colin had picked up at the theatre shop. It smelled
funny. In fact, Alex and Trey temporarily blacked out.
When they woke up, they were fully made up and it looked very professional. But something was amiss. Two misses in fact – father and son had grown female breasts and were now sporting tight skirts showing off long legs and round butts.
“Dad! What the fuck happened to us?” whined Trey in a voice that could only be a young woman’s.
“I don’t know, shit. We better warn Jay and Colin,” Alex replied in a sultry coo that shocked both father and son.
They knocked on the adjoining dressing room.
“Go away,” they heard two girlish voices they never heard before but knew immediately who they were.
“Damm, I guess we all the same problem,” Jay said as she puckered her now pretty lips.
“Problems,” sighed Colin as she fondled one of perky new tits.
“Ladies, five minutes,” yelled the club owner, and all four froze.
“He thinks we’re really girls?” whispered Trey to her would be father and uncles.
“Tonight at the Argus – KISS ME! – the region’s top all-female KISS tribute band,” read Alex on the handouts the club had posted.
“Gina, Paula, Petra and Lace! No way,” Jay read in disbelief.
“Believe it, bro. Look at this,” Colin said as he showed the band’s Facebook page on his iPhone. “As a girl group, we have 1000 more followers than we did as Mack Attack.”
“Look, I’m not ready to accept that I have ovaries and the rest – but, we don’t go out there, we’ll lose our payday and be blackballed forever. Let’s go rock the house, and then when we are done, we’ll wipe this stupid makeup off and try and figure out who stole our manhood – and why.”
And with that, the club went dark and the announcer proclaimed…
“YOU WANTED THE BEST… YOU GOT THE BEST!”
"LOUD – I WANNA HEAR IT LOUD, RIGHT BETWEEN THE EYES!”
“KISS ME” was loud and proud, and the four new ladies rocked the socks of everyone at the Argus that night. The McShanes not only felt great about their performance, they were feeling very comfortable with their new curvy bodies. And when they took the face paint off, they were not too surprised to find that their “condition” remained.
At home, their wardrobe was now 100% “rock chick.” They now lived as three rocking sisters, and Traci felt closer to her mom (Alice) and 2 aunts(Carole & Jacki) than ever before.
They kept playing as a tribute band, but also started a new hard rock group called “Cute Enough To Kiss.” The foursome played constantly, to the delight of their fans – mostly guys. And it’s true – some female musicians do have male groupies.
“Hey – I think cock rock and sweet pussy go together, don’t you agree, girls?,” Alice smirked as her family laughed LOUDLY.
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